I am based in USA and doing Tattva Shakti Vigyaan sadhana after accepting discipleship. It has been almost 6 months now. Initially i did not do complete sequence but doing it full for the last 3 months. I have seen many positive changes in my health. Somehow the weight has been reduced, the overall cholesterol levels are back to normal and I feel energized. I see myself more balanced and energetic.
Lately , my lumbar and neck spondylosis is giving me trouble also i am getting a very light waves of pain in facial area like jaw, below ear, above cheek bones, left shoulder blade. These pain waves are very light. I am not sure if they are from neck spondylosis or part of cleansing from Tattva Shakti Vigyaan practice or kundalini rising?
Additionally I would like my habits like : not able to properly manage anger, trying to be perfect in everything, procrastination, other imprints to go away. Looks like this will happen when manomay and vidyanmay kosha is kindled. Please let me know if any changes needed in my sadhana.
Good to see you are progressing…
As I see through these questions I sense your pattern of seeking perfection in everything and viewing the natural pace of results as ‘delay’ coupled with hurry. The paradox however is that most of wonderful things in life happen without caring about what one expects out of a situation or act. Mother Nature (maid of divine Mother Aadi Shakti) has its own unique way of carrying out the agenda of Hers and ensures rewarding every action and thought we focus on. Some actions might sound repetitive and fruitless but they aren’t really. A gardener continues to guard, nourish and water the tree round the year despite knowing it will bear fruits only when its time comes. One should maintain that attitude in spiritual practices or sadhana.
Now to your question – No, it is not kundalini neither is it part of cleansing process rather the pain waves which you have started feeling are the outcome of reorganizing processes. You may recall my sighting where I told you there are people who fall ill and get something like cold-cough-fever etc. (become रोगी ) occasionally and on the other side there are ones who seemingly never get to such a state (never get cough cold-fever etc.) where they need specific treatment. This second category looks like healthy but in fact most of such people are in the category of सदा-रोगी (always ill). They are the people who have lost major strength of their immunity and their bodies aren’t able to react and respond to such external attacks. In the same way when we start practising Yogasanas and other practices which work on our whole system many positive things happen within which occasionally produce some discomfort on the surface. For example when Shakti-Vahini-Shodhan-Kriya is started almost 90% people suffer from cough, cold, running nose, fever and even loose motion. Now this is cleansing and also boosting of your immune system. The fever itself shows your body has NOW started fighting against the intruders. Further cleansing improves our sensitivity of nerves and therefore we are able to sense minor and lighter events within the body. The pains which were dormant start surfacing.. its not because of some kundalini force it is primarily because of your improved sensitivity. Yes! one thing one must ensure during asanas and every other practice concerning body and breath – NO OVERDOING, NO STRETCHING BEYOND LIMITS, No jerking, No push. Just become attentive to the signals your body is giving and you will be able to take appropriate action on it. Your pain seems to be originating from neck-region. Watch out for movements wherein you are over-stretching or exceeding limits.
How to deal with not being able to properly manage anger –
In every satsang I emphasize on the need of Awareness and there’s no better tool than awareness in controlling the anger. Second thing which you can do is identify the actions or situations which trigger the emotion of anger in you. List out those things and mentally resolve to be neutral and aware in those situations.
trying to be perfect in everything –
There’s nothing wrong in expecting perfection from ‘self’ but the problem is when you start applying this to yourself you expect everyone around to ‘copy’ you. I am knowingly using the word ‘copy’ because till the time they understand the need of perfection in ‘their actions’ they will not be able to make any sincere efforts to change their behaviour. Here my suggestion to you would be – Trying being better than you were yesterday without setting a benchmark because the moment you set a futuristic bench-mark or a goal you aren’t able to look back. And, the key to betterment lies in NOT repeating the mistakes you made in the PAST.
There is a saying – मौत और ख़ुदा को हमेशा याद रखो . I put it little differently – Count the number of days you have lived and the balance number of days of your life (considering you will be able to work and exert physically till the age of 70 years. How many days are left now in your life to do something great?
Does this questioning fuel your sense of urgency? If not then nothing can move you…(smiles)
Second thing which you must recognize and focus on, is – The happiness you shall be deriving once you are able to complete a given work. Of course you can not be motivated for an ordinary outcome. So, choose your goals wisely.
People say Goals should be larger than life – I say, Goals should definitely be larger than life but they should also be longer than our lives!
– Acharya Agyaatadarshan Anand Nath